How To Learn To Be The Best Parent

September 22, 2018

Dad kissing his son

Parenting is a path that many have traveled and some have failed at. We become parents with no training and no manuals and yet we still manage to become good parents despite the lack of experience.

Being a parent is one of the greatest things in the world but there is no secret formula to be the greatest parent in the world. Parenting is not a talent we were born with - it's a skill. It's a skill that needs to be learned over and over again. Those parents who have more than one kid knows that each kid is unique and has their own strengths and weaknesses which ultimately, makes being a good parent even more complicated.

So if we go into the parenting world without no manuals and no training, how can we be better at it? The answer is through conscious learning.

Learning from your parents

The best way to learn how to be a parent is by asking the experts who raised you, your parents. Some people are lucky to have wonderful parents who are loving, caring, involved, and responsible. These people have a tremendous advantage in the parenting journey because they know exactly what to do.

However, there are those who are less fortunate and who have parents that weren't responsible at all. Parents that were absent, neglectful, mean and sometimes even abusive (yikes!). How can these people learn how to be a good a parent?

Even if you had a difficult childhood with difficult parents you are free to choose a different life. I had a difficult childhood with absent parents but, I turned out okay (I think). Because I've learned how to accept these things. At a young age, I found role models who I can emulate. You have the choice to be better at parenting because you had a first-hand experience of how your parents failed at it.

Learning from co-parents

No parent is an island. We all have peers that can help and support us when we're facing challenges. Connecting with other parents is one of the most crucial decisions you have to make on this journey. It will not only benefit you but will also benefit your kids in the future.

While these other parents can't provide you with a training manual, they can give you the guidance you need. They can tell you about their experiences, challenges, and successes in parenting. And I think that's the most valuable thing you can get out of when you learn from other parents.

You also have to know that becoming a parent comes with the challenge of losing some of your friends. It's a sad fact and there's nothing you can do to prevent it from happening. Your priorities will change and some of your friends may not be up to it. On the brighter side, you'll have the opportunity to find out who among your friends are worth keeping. And it's always fun to know and find new people that can have a better impact on your family life.

There are many ways to find other parents to learn from. There are events, social media groups, and blogs that help empower other parents.

Learning From Books and Experts

This is especially helpful for new dads as they are more usually filled with an overwhelming emotion of becoming a parent and trying to make sure that they don't screw up.

Most guys are also aloof in the beginning about learning how to be a parent and are hesitant to really ask for help. Reading books can help dads learn the basics and really get into it without getting out of their comfort zone. Moreover, it'll make the transition for new dads easier and less overwhelming.

I say all these things from experience. I grew up in a broken family and growing up I had all sorts of role models. When I realize that I was going to be a dad there was a part of me that was scared that I might end up being my own parent. But with the help of books and watching parenting videos, I was able to learn more about being a good parent.

There are a ton of parenting books out there. Select the ones that work for you and make the most out of all the resources available.

Learning from experience

There's no better learning experience than being able to really do it. All these learning aren't worth anything if you're not able to apply them in real life scenarios. More importantly, it is through actual parenting that you will gain the confidence you need to move from one stage to another.

Becoming the greatest parent in the world takes time. Don't expect that you'll figure everything out from the get-go As you go along your parenting journey you'll realize that you're not only learning from your experiences but also from your kids.

The best parents are those who don't give up and continues to learn from their kids, from their own and other parents' experiences. Having bad parents or a traumatic childhood shouldn't dictate what type of parent you should be. Learn from their mistakes and learn from your own too. Being a parent is more about growing up and learning how to overcome obstacles no matter how big they are.

Parenting Life Series

I'm starting a blog post series featuring different types of parents from different walks of life. Parenting Life Series aims to provide a deeper look into how the parenting world really works and help educate and inspire other parents through their parenting journey by learning from other parents. So be sure to watch out for it!

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